Everything has a silver lining. It’s all about how you look at things.
“Finger pricks meant I could add to my finger puppet collection. Hospital visits meant playtime and art therapy. Losing my hair meant choosing a wig - having had short brown hair, I wanted to try something different, like long blonde Rapunzel hair, but relented, taking my dad’s advice, I went with a more natural look so people would still recognize me.”
Kareen is the definition of resilience. In 1982, diagnosed with acute lymphoblastic leukemia when she was just 5 years of age, Kareen can’t talk about her cancer without talking about her mom too. Her mom was in treatment for breast cancer at the same time.
“Everything was doubled. Double the sorrow and fear, double the confusion and anxiety, and double the loneliness.” As Kareen described feeling a mix of emotions during that time, through tears she shared that she also felt jealously and guilt for feeling jealous. “I remember my dad going back and forth from my bedside to my mom’s bedside while we were both in hospital undergoing cancer treatment. It must have been so hard for him, but in the hospital ward, I would see other moms and dads together at their child’s bedside and I didn’t have that experience. It was tough.”
Kareen still has vivid memories of the white hospital ward filled with rows of white beds and cribs with a play area at the one end. She remembers that her radiologist looked like Casey Kasem, the DJ who hosted America’s top 40 and was the voice of Shaggy in the Scooby-Doo cartoon. She remembers Dr. DeVeber always being there and even checking in on her at home. She remembers high fevers followed with ice cold baths, blood transfusions, the pressure and pain of spinal taps and the dread and anxiety that accompanied her radiation and chemotherapy …and she’ll never forget the green plastic kidney dish that always accompanied her for days following treatment. She can even remember the hallucinations, like stories, that she experienced from the sedatives she was given to help with her unrelenting nausea. Oh, and craving poached eggs throughout her entire treatment time.
“I remember when my mom and I were both back home after our hospital stays and that we were recognized as the ‘cancer family’ in our neighbourhood. During that time my mom experienced some release and comfort through her art therapy practice. I still have some of my mom’s pieces. As I became stronger my mom’s breast cancer progressed and it was a week after I was deemed cancer free that my mom died. Her artwork provides me with comfort and strength to this very day.”
“My dad, Doug, and my older sister, Cassandra, were my rocks throughout. Despite the stress of what my mother was enduring and all they were feeling, they were always present and there to comfort me, striving to ensure my happiness. They were more concerned about me than themselves.”
Despite all the hardships endured by 5-year-old Kareen, she chose to focus and remember the incredible kindness and caring of the hospital staff. The same care and compassionate support she continues to receive through the aftercare clinic this very day. Kareen knows she’s at greater risk of other cancers because of the treatment she received in the 80’s and she is grateful for the regular monitoring and amazing care she continues to receive. “Despite having had spinal meningioma and some hair loss from centralized radiation, I’m confident that any future challenges I might have will be caught early. I also know that because of testing and regular screening my risk of breast cancer is the same as anyone else.”
“I had no choice as a child and simply had to endure, but thinking back it was that endurance that made me strong and taught me to focus on the good.
Kareen’s dad, Doug, did the same. He focused on making a difference to help others that were experiencing the burdens associated with a childhood cancer diagnosis. Kareen remembers Childcan meetings being hosted in their home. Doug was soon serving as Board Chair and helping raise funds to pay the salary of hospital oncology residents and provide overnight camp experiences for our kids. Camp which Kareen absolutely loved!
“I have a happy life with three cats and two chickens and aspirations of owning a hobby farm, I love animals. I have a beautiful cruelty-free home (no product in my home has been tested on animals) and I enjoy fulfilling work. I chose to always see the silver lining no matter what challenge may lay ahead. I am a survivor!”
Thank you, Kareen. You inspire resilience and silver linings for us all.